Love is the first step (the step you don’t want to take as David White says)—not the second or the third path of imitation. Therefore, love doesn’t resemble anything you have already seen. It is the origin point, which is, strangely enough, not a mere nothing (as the modern would have you believe).
Although it does involve a journey through darkness, how could it be any other way? Without the dark as contrast, how could there be the sun of love? For even the dark is dependent on Love, as all things are. All things depend on that first step (let there be light).
Strangely, we need that duality to show us the non-dual. We need difference and distinction for love-making to happen. We need sparks of polarity. A step forward to truth will cause the dance partner to take a step back, which is a prelude to intimacy.
The first step is to put a pen on the paper, which says ‘I love you’. Not where or what or how. Not a definition or a description. Just the naked fact that we love. Everything else follows from that.
The cynical, the cool, the ironic—refuses to admit that. Never mind, it will fall eventually. And even its postures are part of loves game, loves feathers. But only the truly earnest will take that first step, often caused by pain and disorientation.
Don’t even try. Just take the first step. It is the ego that keeps holding you back. Stab it in the heart, and then take the first step. You need this. You want this. There is nowhere else to go.
The first step isn’t even a step, it is just your destiny. The history of human folly is just the history of thwarting destiny. There is always something to distract you from that first step. But with each distraction, a new karmic knot is created, and more effort is needed.
Was the real sin eating the apple. I question that. Eating the apple was destiny—the first step out of the garden is the first step of adventure. To think otherwise is an insult to the human story, which is that we must move away from childish notions of God to find God again—or rather, we must move away from childhood.
That is love—a step towards growth. For most of us, this is no simple matter, as mired as we are in the reactions, the demands, and the pull backwards into the womb. But growth and evolution demand of us: love or sleep. That is: meet the demand or remain mired in childish things.
Does love mean a land of milk and honey. Not at first. In fact, it means facing the pain, the pain of birth, the pain of loss, the pain of dissociation, the pain of separation. Love isn’t getting what we want; it often means the opposite. That everything is taken away—that door to the dark wood. We can only Love when we have truly imbibed the opposite.
That is, we have gone to the underworld and faced that caricature head-on.
“The first step isn’t even a step, it is just your destiny. The history of human folly is just the history of thwarting destiny. There is always something to distract you from that first step. But with each distraction, a new karmic knot is created, and more effort is needed.”
I have read aloud this piece. I take the liberty of spreading your grounded wisdom when ever I can.
Grounded Wisdom is like fertilizer, it helps almost anything to grow.
My retired life has become all poetry, yours, L Cohen and mine, for now. When ever I can capture a small group of folks attention, I tell them I would like to introduce a friend and poet to them. And I read one of your pieces.
But this one and the line from Dante still resonates like an aria. One can’t hear it enough.
And in a different book I came across a number of poems that jolted my attention: « This has to be about John O’Donahue «
80 speaks like 21 does. It’s a life changer.
Thanks for being here an I hope Substack works for you.
Thank you David. This very much resonates with me. Very much looking forward to the next "3 Sundays".
When we have spent a lifetime lost in others, only to lose them over and over. When we are finally (mercifully) alone, then we will take a 100 steps on shifting ground before taking that first magical step on solid ground.
Love this. So beautiful David. You are an absolute sage. I've been following your work for years. There is so much here for all of us who are heavy hearted and working to step into a new and foreign world.
Looking forward to the January Three Sundays. 2025 is a year of staying close to my growth edge, not turning away from the discomfort, and being ok with not knowing how everything will play out while trusting that I know what the next step is. It’s a year where my actions are born out of love for myself. This poem is the Home Screen on my phone so I don’t forget.
My favorite by you, David. The poem that saved my life. And the poem that I come back to time and time again. Even when I don’t know why I feel as if I have lost something. This poem meets me in my confusion anyway. An excellent one for January 1.
Thank you!
Love is the first step (the step you don’t want to take as David White says)—not the second or the third path of imitation. Therefore, love doesn’t resemble anything you have already seen. It is the origin point, which is, strangely enough, not a mere nothing (as the modern would have you believe).
Although it does involve a journey through darkness, how could it be any other way? Without the dark as contrast, how could there be the sun of love? For even the dark is dependent on Love, as all things are. All things depend on that first step (let there be light).
Strangely, we need that duality to show us the non-dual. We need difference and distinction for love-making to happen. We need sparks of polarity. A step forward to truth will cause the dance partner to take a step back, which is a prelude to intimacy.
The first step is to put a pen on the paper, which says ‘I love you’. Not where or what or how. Not a definition or a description. Just the naked fact that we love. Everything else follows from that.
The cynical, the cool, the ironic—refuses to admit that. Never mind, it will fall eventually. And even its postures are part of loves game, loves feathers. But only the truly earnest will take that first step, often caused by pain and disorientation.
Don’t even try. Just take the first step. It is the ego that keeps holding you back. Stab it in the heart, and then take the first step. You need this. You want this. There is nowhere else to go.
The first step isn’t even a step, it is just your destiny. The history of human folly is just the history of thwarting destiny. There is always something to distract you from that first step. But with each distraction, a new karmic knot is created, and more effort is needed.
Was the real sin eating the apple. I question that. Eating the apple was destiny—the first step out of the garden is the first step of adventure. To think otherwise is an insult to the human story, which is that we must move away from childish notions of God to find God again—or rather, we must move away from childhood.
That is love—a step towards growth. For most of us, this is no simple matter, as mired as we are in the reactions, the demands, and the pull backwards into the womb. But growth and evolution demand of us: love or sleep. That is: meet the demand or remain mired in childish things.
Does love mean a land of milk and honey. Not at first. In fact, it means facing the pain, the pain of birth, the pain of loss, the pain of dissociation, the pain of separation. Love isn’t getting what we want; it often means the opposite. That everything is taken away—that door to the dark wood. We can only Love when we have truly imbibed the opposite.
That is, we have gone to the underworld and faced that caricature head-on.
“The first step isn’t even a step, it is just your destiny. The history of human folly is just the history of thwarting destiny. There is always something to distract you from that first step. But with each distraction, a new karmic knot is created, and more effort is needed.”
I Love this! Well said Andrew, thank you.
I have read aloud this piece. I take the liberty of spreading your grounded wisdom when ever I can.
Grounded Wisdom is like fertilizer, it helps almost anything to grow.
My retired life has become all poetry, yours, L Cohen and mine, for now. When ever I can capture a small group of folks attention, I tell them I would like to introduce a friend and poet to them. And I read one of your pieces.
But this one and the line from Dante still resonates like an aria. One can’t hear it enough.
And in a different book I came across a number of poems that jolted my attention: « This has to be about John O’Donahue «
80 speaks like 21 does. It’s a life changer.
Thanks for being here an I hope Substack works for you.
Al Dussault
Start with the ground of being. Always the best. Not always easy to do.
Thank you David. This very much resonates with me. Very much looking forward to the next "3 Sundays".
When we have spent a lifetime lost in others, only to lose them over and over. When we are finally (mercifully) alone, then we will take a 100 steps on shifting ground before taking that first magical step on solid ground.
Love this. So beautiful David. You are an absolute sage. I've been following your work for years. There is so much here for all of us who are heavy hearted and working to step into a new and foreign world.
Looking forward to the January Three Sundays. 2025 is a year of staying close to my growth edge, not turning away from the discomfort, and being ok with not knowing how everything will play out while trusting that I know what the next step is. It’s a year where my actions are born out of love for myself. This poem is the Home Screen on my phone so I don’t forget.
Thank you! I will be holding this close throughout 2025.
My favorite by you, David. The poem that saved my life. And the poem that I come back to time and time again. Even when I don’t know why I feel as if I have lost something. This poem meets me in my confusion anyway. An excellent one for January 1.
One of my favourites of you! Always grateful for the reminder! Happy New Year to you!
Perfect poem to start this year, close in.
😊
What a great way to start the new year. Thank you.
Love this one such guidance for me today.
Much gratitude.
🙏
One of my favorite poems by David Whyte. I was first introduced to your work by my cousin Carol Teitelbaum. Thank you for this today.